Scary Personals

He could at least use real Tobasco

... Also you should be aware that, in addition to being a strict vegetarian, I believe sincerely in only eating foods produced locally. By locally I mean within 50 feet of my kitchen. As a result, I grow most of my own food. I do, however, live in an apartment, which does limit what I can grow somewhat. So if you cannot accept the fact I eat my houseplants, and those of my neighbors, then perhaps it is best if we just agree to disagree and you move on to the next ad...

I kind of hope he did pour the hot sauce on the plant, since it would then pour down all over his hand and the carpet. But I'm just mean like that.

Labels: male, personal ad, plant, vegetarian, weird

Everybody needs a hobby

Basically I am up for anything. Whatever it will take to get you to go out with me, I'll do. Want me to pay for dinner? Done. Want to go to a movie? You got it. Want me to stand out in a field, put on a fake pregnancy belly, cover it with a vest made out of a garbage sack and let you glue saltines all over my face and body? No problem. What's it going to take to get a date? More importantly, what's it going to take to get a second date?

Personally I prefer Ritz Crackers.

Labels: crackers, male, personal ad, weird

Chchchchanges

There comes a time in every girl's life where she has to make some changes. I have changed my hair, changed my eye colors. I even changed my boobs. Now the big one. I have got these old bras that just don't fit anymore, and I am going to make use of them some way or another. As you can see, they make nice headware. I am sure I can find all sorts of other uses. And I can't wait for winter to see how well they work as earmuffs!

Explain why she did this here.